I mentioned two posts back that something terrible (not life threatening or anything though) had happened to me in my personal life, and in this post I’m going to explain what that was.
As many of you know, a few months back (September to be exact) I had a three year relationship end. I’ve since moved out on my own, and even though our relationship didn’t seem to work, my ex and I are still really good friends. We see each other on a regular basis and we do hang out.
Anyhow, I began to date and in October my mom invited me down for Thanksgiving (this is October since I’m in Canada) and asked if I wanted to bring anyone. I said I sure would, and I brought a woman I had been seeing for a bit.
During our visit, they (my date, my mom, my sister and a female family friend) decided to go for a walk. During this walk, my family decided it was okay to tell my date all about my past relationships, including how long they had lasted and the names of the people I had relationships with.
My date didn’t tell me till a few days later, because she understandably didn’t want to rock the boat.
For my part, I mostly let it slide. I told my sister and mother that I was a private person and didn’t want details of my life given out willy-nilly. If someone wanted to know something about me, they could ask and I would tell them if I wanted them to know.
My family assured me that they knew this and wouldn’t divulge any personal information about me in the future.
I let it drop. I didn’t need the hassle and I figured that since I told them how I felt (without divulging that I knew they had already breached my privacy) this would be enough to deter them from flapping their gums in the future.
Fool that I am…
The next time I visited my mom, she had her best friend over. She’s an out-of-towner and so I don’t see her often. She kept asking about Dexter (my dog) and making small prods at me. For example, our conversations went a bit like this:
Friend: So GC, how’s Dexter doing? Everything okay?
Me: Oh yeah, Dexter is doing wonderfully.
Friend: That’s not what I hear.
And so forth.
Again…I let the matter drop. I didn’t want to argue and I just found the questioning weird. But I was a guest in my mothers home and causing an issue wasn’t something I aspired to.
A few days later, my ex sends me an email. She says my mother had contacted her and said that she didn’t think I was looking after Dexter properly. She said that my mother worried that because I was dating, Dexter would not be my main priority. She worried for his safety and had supposedly told my ex that she feared I would sell him.
I assured my Ex that Dexter was fine and I urged her to come see for herself.
She did. She checked his ears (Dexter suffers from allergies and is on a strict diet) and looked him over. She said he looked great. I showed her his food, medicines etc. My ex admitted that my mom had been completely wrong and that she thought Dexter looked great.
At this point I was fairly angry. Not at my ex, but at my mother who thought I would actually harm my best friend, Dexter. Since my breakup, I’ve had some rough days, and let me tell you guys and gals, Dexter has seen me through many of them. He’s sat with me and snuggled when I was down. He’s made me laugh when I wanted to rage or cry. I wouldn’t harm a hair on his head.
Again, I approached my mother calmly and asked why she had told my ex these things.
My mother said my ex had misunderstood and she hadn’t meant any of it.
Again I let it drop. I didn’t want to argue and I thought (again) that she would learn her lesson and not talk behind my back.
I would be sorely disappointed once more.
I will leave the ending for Part 2 of this post. If you’ve managed to make it this far, thank you for reading.