Stressing About Stress: Worrying Sucks!

Dexter deals with stress by sleeping...on me. Who has the better deal?
Dexter deals with stress by sleeping...on me. Who has the better deal?

Dexter deals with stress by sleeping…on me. Who has the better deal?

Stress. We all have it, but it’s how we deal with it that matters.

My sister recently sent me a Facebook notification. It made me open my FB page for the first time in several months, but it was actually worth it. It was a post by a ‘Captain Paul Watson’. I have no way to know if it was a legit post, but the author talks about how to cope with stress.

Since my breakup, I’ve been faced with a lot of stress that I’m not used to, and I’ve had to find ways to deal with it or go insane.

So the Captain’s advice basically boils down to this:

It is what it is. Whatever the issue, whatever the threat, whatever the circumstances it simply is what it is. Stressing will not change the situation. All problems can be dealt with or ignored.

This actually resonated with me because I try to live by this philosophy. If something happened that I couldn’t fix, I tried not to worry about it.

Anyhow, Captain Watson counsels:

  • Stay calm because nothing is worth worrying about.
  • Don’t worry about material objects. They’re nice to have but don’t let them anchor you to stress.
  • Friends are either friends or they aren’t. If one betrays you, walk away.
  • Treat loneliness as an opportunity to discover yourself.
  • Accept people for who they are and if a relationship ends, move on with appreciation.
  • Fear is poison and things will be what they will be so there is no need to fear.
  • Ignore people who gossip, make false accusations etc. Their behavior stems from insecurity and stress and can be easily ignored.
  • Death is an absolute and you will die regardless of whether you worry about it.

Those are some of the basic points the author makes. Of course, I paraphrased them and left out the examples. It was a long post.

I agree with most of them. I tend to ignore things I can’t change because stressing about them won’t change that I’m powerless to change them.

However, I do suffer from stress headaches and recently I’ve felt more stressed than usual. So maybe I’m not doing as good a job as I thought.

So I’ve been working out like a crazy person and this seems to have helped a lot. By the time I get home at night, I’m pretty exhausted. I fall into bed and wake up in the morning and do it all over again. It helps that I have a pretty great job, and that I work with people who could brighten the gloomiest of days.

It’s hard to glower when a deaf, blind guy tells you that he misses you after a vacation.

Things might be going sideways for me, but I try to view it as an adventure. I’ll get to do, see and experience new things. On my adventure, I’ll have good old Dexter.

IMG_20150818_223535082

Who will love me no matter what.

Last night I got home feeling a bit sorry for myself. Dexter was having none of it. He really does brighten up my world.

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33 Comments

  1. There is nothing quite like a Dexter in your life, that will accept you so totally, without restraint. That one made me laugh, and tear up , too.

    I think stress right now is a given, you’ve got a lot going on, inside and out. It will take time, maybe weeks, or months, or even longer, to find the handles on it, but day by day, just like quitting smoking, it gets better. Maybe not easier, not for awhile, but better. It’s a wound, and needs to heal. It looks like Dexter knows something is wrong, and he’s doing his best to be a comfort dog.

    Im glad you have him.

    • He’s always done that after I’ve been away for a while. He’ll wait till I’m settled and then surprise me. He’s always laid on my chest. He did it when he was 8 weeks old and he still does.

      When he knows something is wrong, he just stays extra close to you. He always has to be in contact with you.

      And so true about the restraint part. It’s really an amazing thing and a great pick me up.

      And I do take vitamins, including D. 🙂

  2. I know that stressed feeling. Mine starts between my shoulder blades and rises up through my shoulders and into my neck. Literally, stress is a pain in the neck. Like you, I find that exercise and Dottie and Bitzer really help a lot. Doggy hugs are the best!

    I’m sorry for what you’re going through. Changes in relationships(no matter how mutual or amicable) and moving can be extremely stressful on top of our already stressful lives.

    • That’s exactly how it feels!

      I can also tell I’m going to have a headache when I wake up and my neck cracks every time I move my head.

      Doggy hugs are the best.

      And yes, the move is stressful. Not to mention changing bank accounts, insurance etc. But I think given a bit of time, things will start to look up. It’s super helpful that we’re not fighting.

  3. I loved this post GC, and the advise from the Captain is sound. I used to own a business where I helped people manage chronic pain, chronic stress and excessive mind chatter that caused insomnia. I did this using neurotechnology and clinical relaxation therapy techniques.

    I just wanted to mention that I think you are on the right track. There’s so much to be grateful for, and you’ve mentioned some of them. Although you can’t control certain things, you’re in charge of how you respond to your circumstances.

    The key, I think, is to look at your brain as a muscle. Studies show that having a positive outlook supports brain growth, as well as the generation and reinforcement of new synapses, especially in your prefrontal cortex, which serves as the integration center of all of your brain-mind functions. If you stay focused on stressful thoughts, then parts of the brain will begin to atrophy, such as the hippocampus. In other words, exercise both your body and your brain.

    🙂

  4. For me, my LTR-breakup resulted in stress, but I found at least it was predictable, “ordinary” stress. Not having to worry about the unexpected from another person emotionally involved.

    Pets are awesome when it comes to the unconditional love kind of thing 🙂

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